Have you ever noticed what your habits are in regards to discomfort? The first time I was asked to think on my relationship and habits with discomfort, I was in a yoga class with a really gifted teacher, Nadine McNeil. She had us in a position where we started out in child’s pose and then had us move our arms into prayer position above our head, but on a block in front of us- if you can imagine that. It was intensely uncomfortable on my triceps and shoulders and after just a few moments, I wanted to move away from the pose. Nadine told us then that it was incredibly uncomfortable but it was an important pose for flexibility and asked us to use the moment to reflect on our habits in regards to discomfort.
I’ve often asked myself this questions in the months since. This morning during my meditation session, my shoulder, hips, and ankles were protesting about staying in the meditation pose. I nearly quit but then I remembered to ask myself about my commitment and my ability to endure discomfort (not pain!) to get to my goal. And so I stayed meditating and not surprisingly, when I recommitted to my meditation practice and told myself it was just 20 more minutes, most of my aches went away. I was able to easily make it another 13 minutes before sensations of discomfort again arose. And then it was just 7 more minutes and then it was done.
Revealing My Blindspots
I love it when my everyday life awakens me to habits and thoughts that have been mostly unconscious to me. In this case, meditation for over an hour is important to me because my meditation practice really deepens after about 45 minutes so the remaining 35 minutes are much more peaceful and centered than the swirling maelstrom of thoughts and idea of the initial 45 minutes.I want that more than I want to stop the discomfort of the moment.
Our Primitive Brain’s Message
Often our primitive brain wants use to move away from discomfort. It’s in the driver’s seat when we’re not present and shining the light of consciousness on our every day acts. It’s one of our primitive brain’s purpose- to keep us safe. But without experiencing discomfort (not pain!), we don’t grow. We never get out of our comfort zone and we never really can master anything new without experience some initial discomfort- right up until it becomes our new normal.
Start Noticing Today
Start noticing how automatic it’s become to move away from any discomfort, physical or mental. Notice it without judgement. And then begin to lean into the discomfort, little by little. Soon enough, it’ll be your new normal and you can uplevel your baseline.
NOTE: None of these are affiliate links. Just my honest thoughts.
A Woven Bust at the Yoga Barn
I am definitely a seeker of knowledge, experience, travel, love, and more. I finally – FINALLY- decided to hire a coach for the first time back in 2007 because I realized I needed better thoughts. The way I was thinking and living my life wasn’t working for me but I didn’t know how to be happier.
IT ALL STARTED WITH UPLEVEL YOUR LIFE
So, in secret because I didn’t want to be ridiculed, I bought Christine Kane‘s group coaching class Uplevel Your Life and started on MY path. It’s been twisty. It’s been turny. It’s been steps up and steps back. Her class was exactly what I was looking for. I wept when I read the first several lessons. What a gift.
And from there I was off. I know that they are better thoughts that serve me better and I’ve hired several coaches in the intervening years. Most of them in group coaching sessions but a few handfuls in one on one sessions too. I think they both are helpful in different ways at different times in one’s life.
Group coaching is helpful when you’re super busy and you just can’t be available at a specific time. (I’m looking at you, new mom of twins or new RFP just hit the street and you’re working upwards of 100 hours per week or any such intense moments in your life).
A VERY QUICK TOUR OF SOME OF MY PAST COACHES
I’ve hired Christine Kane in multiple ways, including her UYL, Gold Business coaching, and Getting your First 10 Clients. I’ve hired and trained with Sara Wiseman in private and group calls for all my woowoo needs and got certified through her wonderful, loving Intuition University. I worked with Erin Pavlina for a long weekend in a small group setting in her home, to get further trained on doing readings and sessions with clients. Amazing.
I hired JaiKaur to help me heal some of my earlier trauma. Amazing. Totally recommend. I bought Jeff Walker’s PLF program- I think his work is for someone who’s a bit more advanced in their business than mine but he’s shown me what is possible.
BROOKE CASTILLO AND THE LIFE COACH SCHOOL
And about 2 months before we moved to Bali, I took the plunge and joined Brooke Castillo’s Self Coaching Scholars. My first month in her program was Dec 2018. Christmas. Kids. Plans fell in place to move to Bali in Jan 2019. And I didn’t get to much of the Dec program. Then we moved to Bali.
And upon arrival in Bali and about a month of settling in, I turned back to her program to “start” it in earnest. I didn’t give it the time it deserved at first and then when I tried to access the video trainings, I couldn’t do it (technology-wise). It took me a few months to figure it out that not being able to view the videos wasn’t an internet problem. It was that Indonesia blocks all Vimeo videos. Can you believe? It took me 4 long months to realize I needed to buy a VPN to tunnel back to the US (or anywhere else like Singapore or Australia) to be able to watch the videos. But by that time, I had decided I couldn’t do the program without the videos. And that I didn’t have the time. I love my excuses. I laugh at it now.
Fast forward to Jan 2020. We’d been back in the US for about a month but I’d spent the first three weeks of Jan spending three to four nights a week at the hospital with my very ill Dad (pre-Coronavirus- ah those were the days). He finally got released in late Jan and I was able to spend the next several days resting and not traveling 100 miles round trip to visit my Dad in the extremely far away hospital.
With that rest, I faced February trying to reintegrate into the US and settle back into a routine here. I knew I wanted to relaunch my business and the idea to start again on my program with Self Coaching Scholars bubbled up, to support me on my journey. And so I made the commitment to begin again on 1 March with the December program subject. (Each month has a specific subject- Dec was the Year of Doing the Impossible). And it’s been amazing. Even without the videos and with even less free time than I had in Bali, I’ve made the time and effort to listen to the teachings and Q and As that I downloaded from Dec 2018. I followed through with the program, pretty much with a 100% compliance.
And the Universe is amazing. I’m so so glad I made the true commitment in early Feb because life sure took a hard turn in early/mid March with the whole COVID-19/coronavirus upheaval. Brooke puts out free podcasts and I’ve been listening to those and I had the privilege of being able to hear her take on the crisis through additional podcasts that she put out in mid March. Such gifts. She is so incredibly compassionate and yet no nonsense. She speaks my language, for sure.
I started on the Jan 2019 month in April 2020 and have been working the program every since.
I can’t recommend her school or her teachings enough. She is DA BOMB. Amazing. I would actually ditch the idea of being a coach myself and just direct all clients to her except for one thing that sets me apart as a coach. Brooke isn’t as focused on the woowoo side of things as I want to be in my life. She has so much to offer to me in all things except the woowoo side of life. But Brooke is fully Brooke and we don’t want her any other way, right?
So definitely run to your phone RIGHT NOW to start listening to Brooke’s podcasts or even join her school. You won’t regret it.
Get the Help You Need
Each of my coaches/mentors have helped me enormously. I love learning new things and it’s clear I’m a lifelong learner. I love upgrading my mental model and my thoughts and getting additional resources to help me make my way in the world. I think working with coaches is a great way to get stuff done and there is so much content out there. There’s just no reason for you to keep living and playing small- except for your mindset. Upgrade your mindset and your thoughts and your life will be increasingly amazing.
PS I forgot to include the wise and amazing Martha Beck and Lissa Rankin, These two simply must be mentioned when talking about coaches and mentors.
